Break-ups can be tough… we’ve all been there when we think someone is the one, just to have our hearts ripped out of our chest again and again. Maybe they just weren’t making you happy anymore, maybe they were too controlling, maybe they said or did the wrong things when they were angry, maybe there was someone else, or maybe you guys just mutually fell out of love. Either way, the relationship is over and now you’re wondering how to move on and find someone new. Many people when they are at this point of recovery after a break-up tend to go onto dating apps to fill the lonely and see what’s out there. However, when you are lonely after a break-up, you tend to forget about the dangers of romance scams that could potentially come with swiping left or right on a dating app.
We Crave Intimacy When We Are Lonely
It all starts off when you swipe right as you’re looking at an attractive person on a dating app. This attractive person knows all of the right things to say, such as how beautiful you look or how they want to get to know you more. They flirt non-stop to win you over, and it works since your ex-partner didn’t say any of the sweet things this person is saying to you.
Because you’re swept off your feet, you start falling more and more for this person. They start to make you feel like you’re their world to where nothing else could ever come between you guys because your new partner makes you think that no one else meant that much to them. They say all the things you want to hear, you get to know them more and more, and you genuinely think your partner is also interested in getting to know you more and more.
Your relationship is rushed because of how happy you are and you start talking about your futures after only a few months. Within these few months, you feel like you already trust this person to the fullest extent because all you feel with them is joy. You feel like nothing can tear you two apart and no issues will arise within this relationship, because this partner is treating you so much better than everyone else.
You might not have met this person in real life or video chatted with them yet, but you know they are real because of all the conversations you guys have shared. You also know that before you know it, you will see this person every day for the rest of your life… or so you thought.
All of a Sudden… Your New Partner Needs Money for Never-Ending Emergencies
You get a message from your partner and you figure it’s them saying how beautiful you are again… until you see the dollar amount in your text messages. Your heart drops a little as you read that your loved one can’t afford groceries and needs $50 from you so that they don’t grow hungry. You start feeling really bad and think that $50 isn’t that big of a deal, you know your significant other will help you out with things once they meet you in person anyways. So you give them the $50, no additional questions asked.
The next week, they get into a medical or work emergency and need a few thousand dollars to fix it. These costs would cover any hospital bills if they are in a medical emergency, or if it’s a work-related emergency their business will stay intact. You start feeling super bad again at how bad they are suffering as they promise they will pay you every single penny back. So you oblige and give them the money, knowing you’ll eventually get it back.
That’s when the debt starts growing. Your partner eventually convinces you to sell the most important valued items that you hold dear to your heart, like your car or your house. They claim that they are more important, their medical bills are more important, their business is more important. They tell you that the items you are selling are just materialistic and that they will get you a brand new house and car when they see you next. It feels overwhelming and never-ending, and eventually, you have nothing left to give them.
The Person You Thought You Loved Isn’t Truly Who They Say They Are
You apologize heavily to your partner, telling them you don’t have any more money to give them. Your bank account is wiped out and you no longer have a car or a house. You’re having to live with family and friends or get yourself a cheap apartment just to have a place to live. Right after you sent that apology, you don’t get another text back from the person you thought loved you. You try texting them countless times, but you realize you’ve been blocked by them.
That’s when reality sets in and your heart sinks as you research on Google what just happened to you. The sweet texts, the lack of video chat calls, them rushing you into a relationship too fast, the way they came up with every excuse in the book to need money. That wasn’t love, it was a romance scam and they weren’t even the person in the pictures that you fell in love with.
The Reality of Romance Scams Causes People to Feel Even More Lonely
You’re reminded of your past break up, and now this break up that feels like your heart has been ripped out of your chest all over again. You go through all the emotions as to how you hate your scammer but also wish you could communicate with them one last time. It’s a contradictory struggle you wish you could remove yourself from, but just can’t for the life of you.
How to Avoid Romance Scammers on Dating Apps
When you’re going through a break-up, you should avoid dating apps altogether if you want to remain safe from the dangers of romance scams. However, if you can’t resist the urge here are a few helpful tips for if you need to swipe left or right within the endless sea of people.
- Make sure to video chat the person or meet them in-person before getting yourself into a serious relationship.
- Don’t send anyone on the Internet money for any reason.
- Don’t give anyone you met on the Internet your personal information for any reason.
- Don’t click on any random links someone has sent you.
- Don’t fall for every single sweet word someone sends you, especially if you’re just getting over a break-up.
If You’ve Been Through Romance Scams, Social Catfish is Here to Help You
If you feel like this story sounds like you at all and you’ve been a victim of a romance scam, Social Catfish is here to help you! You can use our reverse search toolbar to look-up any name, email address, phone number, social media username, or image to see who it is you’ve really been talking to.
If you have been through a similar situation, you can share your story with us for a chance to be featured on our upcoming YouTube videos and blog posts! All you need to do is email ShareMyStory@socialcatfish.com for a chance to educate our audiences on the experiences you have gone through. Help us end romance scams once and for all.